Ah, the Artificial “intelligence” (lower case ‘i’), that I just looove to rant about, our marvelous fcuking messiah that everyone drools over, it is now claiming that it will automate the boring tasks from under your ass, and free us all from your soul-sucking work.

And sure, AI does automate, sort of, like our passive-aggressive office cleaner, who empties our trash bin but always “accidentally” tosses out my important meeting notes, just to remind me who’s really in control.

And now for a near Biblical parable. . .

Automation today is kinda like teaching a fish to ride a bike. Oh yeah, it is impressive when it doesn’t end in catastrophic failure.

And that basically sums up all of the Agentic AI frameworks out there (except for one, lone wolf)

But if you thought you had bought yourself some breathing room for a year or two, I would kindly like to ask you to brace yourself, because there is a new cyberpunk kid in town and it is called Kairos, and it is here to “change everything” . . . again.

Of course, Kairos promises to kill monotonous work, but not by programming a hoard of dumb-as-fcuk agents, but by recording your screen, stealing your job’s soul, and doing your meaningless shit for you forever. Sounds like an existential crisis in the making, and also alluring at the same time.

So, welcome to your new life.

Or it’s new life.

Ask AI

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So, WTF is Kairos anyway?

Kαιρός (had to look this one up) is an ancient Greek word meaning the right moment for taking action. It’s not about time. It is about timing., that particular badass moment when the universe aligns perfectly and you either grab it by the pearls or spend the rest of your miserable life slapping yourself for missing it.

Say for the fun of it that you are training that annoying coworker who never listens, but this one is actually paying attention (for a change, creepy, I know). This little minion (not Oompa Loompa, that is reserved for Agentic AI) is watching you click, and type while you fumble through your monotonous tasks, and it actually learns by listening to your half-assed explanations of what you are doing as well.

There is no coding involved, no drag-and-drop fuckery, just a voyeuristic AI sitting there, watching your every move, knife in hand to eventually cut you down, like a sweet digital Chucky. . .

Honestly, it’s probably smarter than half the people you work with anyway.

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Why the hell would I trust Kairos over regular automation tools

Goood question !!

Ever tried traditional automation?

Nah?

It is the tech way of trying to explain what it is that you do to earn your excuse for a paycheck everey month, to your drunk family at Christmas. Automation, with the likes of UIPath is painful, tedious, and only sometimes ends well. Businesses bleed endless hours dealing with brain-numbing shit like invoice processing or customer complaints, trying to smoothen friction in processes, and work, because traditional tools are too damn complex for the average keyboard warrior.

But Kairos, is kinda different (so they say).

You don’t code, you simply “show” it what you are doing, and it figures out the rest. Sorta like training my dog to fetch me a beer, but way more depressing when I realize my dog will soon replace my ass entirely.

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How Kairos plans to watch your every move (in a creepy way, of course)

Here’s their mind-blowingly simple premise.

You record your screen and narrate what you’re doing like you’re some wannabe YouTube influencer, but of course in an awkward kind of way, like “so now, uh, we click here and, uh, copy this”, you mumble into your headset, and at the same time question every decision you made in your pathetic life.

Kairos notes every mouse twitch and sigh of you existential crisis, and it is turning your miserable workflow into something it can repeat endlessly but without the angst associated with you, ya lucky bastard.

So, here’s the deal with Kairos’ “groundbreaking” features:

It stalks your screen like your ex on Facebook.

Automates your mundane shit after one demonstration. Zero coding.

Pretends to be your “coworker” but with fewer smoke breaks (until it can axe you)

Turns your recorded misery into a forever repeatable thingy.

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Now, who exactly should be terrified about their job security now

Kairos’ cheerleaders and LinkedIn “Influencers” tout these “amazing” use cases, which roughly translate to “Here’s how we’ll put half of you fuckers out of work”.

Lemme sum them up.

Finance. No more staring blankly at Excel sheets on a Monday morning.

E-commerce. Refunds processed faster than Alibaba deletes your negative reviews.

HR. Screening applicants and making sure no humans ever read your cover letter again.

Healthcare. OMG. Why also healthcare? Haven’t they read my rant on Dr. Oz? Because we all want healthcare advice from an AI that’s watched exactly one bored receptionist once.

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And just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse…

Remember when we all laughed at automated cashiers until half the supermarket staff vanished overnight?

Welcome to the sequel, assholes.

To me, Kairos is another step towards automation meant to swallow entire professions whole.

Have you read my article about the World Economic Forum’s Future of Work report?

Don’t.

It’ll kill your mood instantly, and keep you up tonight.

But that report was written with Agentic AI in mind, but not with Kαιρός.

This ain’t just speculation anymore.

It is the bloody twilight of repetitive white-collar work.

Your cushy desk job, your beautiful Excel spreadsheets, well, Kairos is coming for it all. White-collar workers everywhere should probably start practicing saying, “would you like fries with that” just in case.

Kairos’ marketing team might promise a “better work-life balance”.

Hahahahahaha! (cynical laughter).

Because let’s get real, it is really offering your job up as a human sacrifice on the altar of productivity.

Your boss, advised by conslutants like me, see dollar signs, while you see redundancy packages.

Now this, my friend, is the actual new world of AI-driven unemployment.

YOU write your own eulogy.

But tell me, is Kairos actually worth a damn, Marco?

Lemme give it a shot.

The appeal of Kairos lies in its simplicity.

It is idiot-proof automation (but don’t underestimate human idiocy).

Businesses might drool at the thought of employees freed from monotonous, repetitive work, but let’s face it, they are not planning to let you relax, they are planning to let you go.

And all it takes is one treacherous Judas like colleague who is in desperate need of a few silverlings, and voila – redundancy!

Be scared.

Very, very scared, because early access is available now, and it is giving you front-row tickets to your own professional funeral. But only after some real-world testing it myself can I say how thoroughly Kairos will strip jobs away from real humans.

So enjoy your screen-time for now, because pretty soon, you’ll only be watching from the comfort of your couch.

Meanwhile, I’ve come up with a great tagline for them peeps at Kairos:

Kairos – Because who knew training your digital replacement could feel this depressingly effortless

Signing off while I still can.

Marco

Oh? Did I ask you to take the survey?

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I build AI by day and warn about it by night. I call it job security. Let’s keep smashing delusions with truth. We are the chaos. We are the firewall. We are Big Tech’s PR nightmare.

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14. Prediction: OpenAI will go public, and here comes the greedy shitshow | LinkedIn
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